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Prince of Permsia's avatar

Overall, a good story. I found your protagonist's interactions with Sera to be especially well done. An almost sibling-like dynamic. I can't quite figure out what she is, but I suppose that will be explained in future chapters.

You gave me a fantasy name overload at first, but I was able to settle in.

I really wish you would give us a map. I at least have a hard time visualizing locations based on names alone.

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Sam Liebl's avatar

All great takes.. tysm that’s the problem with serials—they’re undone — people expect so much for the story to be resolved. They don’t wanna pay for it before it’s done.

And I get that. I’m the same way. I guess that’s what I learned.

Not every risk pays off . I’m not giving up on Substack. I’m just very disappointed.

Thank you for your kind words

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Prince of Permsia's avatar

No problem. I have heard about that. Martin and Rothfuss traumatized a whole of fantasy fans to not want to pick up entire series before they are finished. Maybe start with short stories. Establish a reputation for reliability, and then put out a book. Personally I like following an ongoing story.

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Sam Liebl's avatar

I can’t. My health insurance goes away Eom. I mean I will, but updates will likely …..idk man I’m fucking DoorDashing and losing money for bringing an audience in

I’m grateful to them Beyond words, which is a writer means quite a bit

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Prince of Permsia's avatar

Take care of yourself man.

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Sam Liebl's avatar

God I wish my map were persistent. I hand drew one. It was meant to be a statement on how fugacious maps were in the military world. Supposed to be kind of like a fog of war thing. I’ll just have to repost it somewhere. I wish someone had told me how important maps were in fantasy apparently.

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Elaine's avatar

I finally made my way through after interacting with you during your live the other day! I'm really enjoying your work- it's very compelling. ♡

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Lila's avatar

oooo this is very neat. i'm drawn to your writing style and i can't wait to read more when i can.

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Alex Shifman's avatar

Really like the authorial move of creating a mental character! Really cool how you made Eathel’s internal monologue a dialogue. It pulls me along as a reader, giving me so much more than exposition. Respect!

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Sam Liebl's avatar

Thank you very very much. I appreciate that. I hope you’ll let me know what you think of subsequent chapters.

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Alex Shifman's avatar

Gladly!

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The Brothers Krynn's avatar

Interesting

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Apr 3
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Sam Liebl's avatar

God @substack needs better navigation tools ASAP. It's in the Table of Contents. https://stack.samliebl.com/p/table-of-contents

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